She's That Founder: Business Strategy, Time Management and AI Magic for Impactful Female Leaders

075 | Drop the Act: Why Transparent Leaders Build Stronger Teams

• Dawn Andrews • Season 2 • Episode 75

Share episode

Send us a text

Pretending you're unbothered as a leader? It’s like wearing emotional Spanx; smooth on the outside, can’t breathe on the inside.

In this short and sharp episode, I’m calling out the pressure to perform instead of lead, and why trying to appear polished can actually kill connection, creativity, and trust on your team. I’ll share one cringe-but-true moment that changed the way I show up and give you a mindset shift (and one simple line) that will help you lead with power, not pretense.

In this episode, you’ll learn…

  • Why performance-based leadership is suffocating your power
  • How pretending you're "fine" erodes team trust and creativity
  • The leadership reframe: unreadable ≠ strong — relatable = powerful

This episode at a glance:

[0:30] - That’s not power. That’s performance under pressure.

[2:16] - I brought pain into that room voluntarily, I chose style over strength.

[2:54] -We think we’re being strong, but we’re silencing the very signals that make us powerful.

[4:25] -You weren’t born to suffer for your leadership aesthetic. You were born to lead grounded, real, and barefoot if you damn well please.

Resources and links mentioned in this episode:

Want to increase revenue and impact? Listen to “She's That Founder” for insights on business strategy and female leadership to scale your business. Each episode offers advice on effective communication, team building, and management. Learn to master routines and systems to boost productivity and prevent burnout. Our delegation tips and business consulting will advance your executive leadership skills and presence.

Dawn Andrews:

Pretending you're unbothered as a leader. It's like walking around an emotional Spanx. From the outside, smooth inside, you can't breathe. And then add high heels to that nightmare. Heels you knew weren't broken in, but you wore them anyway because they looked good. Yeah, that's what pretending feels like. You look composed, you look powerful, but you're counting the seconds until you can get out of there and take those damn things off. That's not power, that's performance under pressure.

Dawn Andrews:

This is she's that founder the no fluff corner of the internet for bold women building big things. I'm Dawn Andrews, and this quick hit is your hot shot of truth clarity or just a loving shove in the right direction.

Dawn Andrews:

So let's get into it. Hey everybody, welcome back. So glad to have you. These short episodes are when I get to just be super, super real with you guys. So quick story for you. I was leading a training session for 200 executives. Big day, big room. I wore these cute new shoes that I hadn't broken in yet, leopard print flats. They were fantastic. Completed the look, so to speak. And I wore them because they matched the outfit, and they felt leadery. I mean, honestly, I felt like I kind of was crushing it. But by 10am my feet were shredded, blisters, limping. The shoes had stretched in a weird way so they weren't fully staying on my feet. It was like wearing painful flip flops. And the worst part, I couldn't focus. I wasn't present. I wasn't powerful. I was silently screaming through every comment, every transition, every breakout session, smiling on the outside and suffering underneath. The second I got back to my room at lunch break, I threw the shoes out, literally toss them in the trash. And maybe you feel like this is a, you know, a big reaction. Put some band aids on girl. You can get that handled. No, but this is why I threw them out, because I realized that I brought pain into that room voluntarily. I chose style over strength and being performative over being present.

Dawn Andrews:

And the reason I'm calling it out is because we do that a lot as leaders. We walk into leadership rooms blistered, sometimes literally, sometimes emotionally. We smile through things that hurt. We nod when someone misses a deadline or makes a sexist comment in a meeting. We let it slide when we want to scream, no, not, okay. And when we do these things, we think we're being strong, but actually we're silencing the very signals that make us powerful.

Dawn Andrews:

So here's this week's mindset. Tweak the strongest leaders aren't unreadable. They're relatable. If your team never sees your frustration, your truth, your fire, they won't bring theirs. They'll perform for you. They'll hide from you. They'll give you the version of themselves they think you'll approve of. And that is how creativity dies. That's how trust erodes.

Dawn Andrews:

So here's your permission slip. Take off the heels, toss the emotional Spanx, say what's true, and try this line next time something doesn't sit right. I want to be honest. That didn't land well for me. Can we talk about it? That's not too much, that's not drama, that's leadership, that's you being a clear signal in a noisy room. And you'd be surprised how much stronger your team becomes when you show up unfiltered, because truth isn't weakness, it's direction. Told you it was short and sharp. That's how we do.

Dawn Andrews:

If this hits home for you, don't just nod, download the feedback fix and start saying what needs to be said clearly and confidently. And if you're still walking around in blistering shoes and emotional Spanx, Oh girl, toss them out. You weren't born to suffer for your leadership esthetic. You were born to lead grounded, real and barefoot, if you damn well please. Because I certainly wish I would have back in the day see you next time you